ScriptWorks 30/60/90 - 16 August 2013

Prompt:

BedSpread Cross Country Quest

Some night when you are lying in bed with someone, each of you make a map of the sheets.

The rises and falls where your legs are and where it wrinkles are mountains. The spaces between are valleys. Imagine little yous, each beginning from opposite sides of the bed, crossing to the other. Give yourselves a certain amount of time. Say two weeks. Mark on your individual maps which paths you would take. Mark where you would camp each night.

Where do you think there are villages or farm houses. What is the most difficult part of the journey? Did you leave enough time to get there? What is the most dangerous part of the journey? Where would bandits hide out and accost you? Where is the most beautiful part of the journey? Where are the great views? Are there any places where farmers, sheep, and therefore wolves would likely congregate? Once you have defined your journeys, compare them. Do you meet each other along the way? Or do you miss each other?-Kirk Lynn, playwright/educator

Response:

DIRK, 32, affable, easy-going artist, sits up in bed next to his wife, YOLANDA, dark complexion, dark hair, solid, financial analyst.

DIRK
(running his hands across the blanket covering them)
See, the mountains, the valleys’...

YOLANDA
Is this your way of asking me to have sex?

DIRK
No!  Why would you think that?

YOLANDA
Because some of those mountains and valleys are more than just folds in the blanket, if you know what I mean, and it’s been over a month since we had sex, and if this is your way of asking me, the answer is yes.

DIRK
I’m not asking you for sex!

YOLANDA
Well, why not!?  Is there something wrong?

DIRK
There’s nothing wrong.  I know you’ve been working a lot..

YOLANDA
Yea, I know.  Nights and weekends.  Hence the lack of a sex life.

DIRK
I’m not trying to pressure you into having sex with me.  I thought you might just want to relax.  Have a quiet evening.

YOLANDA
I am tired...

DIRK
So I thought we could take a little imaginary vacation.

Yolanda rolls her eyes.

YOLANDA
Alright.

DIRK
I know it sounds silly...

YOLANDA
The price I pay for having married an artist.

DIRK
(slightly frustrated)
Give it a chance.

YOLANDA
(giving in)
An imaginary vacation.

DIRK
(smiling and runs his hand over the blanket again)
Hills and valleys. You start on your side, I’ll start on mine, and we can meet somewhere in the middle...

YOLANDA
And have sex.

Dirk rolls his eyes.

DIRK
We can have sex, but first... the journey.

Dirk puts his fingers out at the edge of the blanket on his side and starts to walk them toward the middle.

DIRK
I start off in deep, dark woods and the going is slow as I creep up the hill.  When I get to the top of the hill, I can see a valley with a little stream in it below and more mountains beyond.

Dirk looks up at Yolanda.

DIRK
What’s it like on your side of the map?

Yolanda puts her fingers down on the her side of the blanket.  She looks up at Dirk and smiles.

YOLANDA
I have a Maserati and a super highway on my side of the map.

She zooms her hand across the map, flattening the hills and valleys, grabs her husband and push him down, rolls on top of him and plants a big kiss on his lips.
Curtain.